Funny notes and clever jokes left in public bathrooms

By Jake Schroeder
Funny notes and clever jokes left in public bathrooms
Funny notes and clever jokes left in public bathrooms

Public bathrooms are usually not the most fun places to visit, but these pictures offer a few hilarious exceptions to that rule. Some sneaky visitors took the time to leave funny, and weird, notes and jokes in the stalls of these bathrooms – unexpectedly entertaining the people who snapped these photos.

Limbo

Imagine the terror one might feel if this toilet note actually turned out to be an accurate warning. Before you know it, someone has come limboing underneath the door to your stall, all while not falling over and seemingly bending their back as though it was rubber.

Limbo
Limbo

A challenge

This challenge is basically setting everybody up to fail. It is so simple and puerile, but you can’t help but fail it. It’s like shouting elephant at somebody and then immediately asking them not to think about an elephant, it’s just not possible.

A challenge
A challenge

A different kind of emergency

Of course, this is just a goof, as wise aleck scribbled a person on the paper towel roll, making it seem as if they’re stuck in the dispenser. Pretty funny, right? Well, yeah, but it got us thinking. What if everyone just saw it, laughed, and then left, but that was actually a real person?

A different kind of emergency
A different kind of emergency

Okay, so they’re two-dimensional – maybe they got cursed by wizard or something, destined to be stuck in that paper towel dispenser until someone was wise enough to rescue them. Don’t worry, barefoot 2D towel man! We’ll save you!

No need to fight, guys

Wow, we have to say finding this much nice sentiments and good cheer in a public bathroom is pretty rare. Nevertheless, this single bathroom wall brought together not one, not two but three people who really just wanted a stranger or two to leave feeling better about themselves.

No need to fight, guys
No need to fight, guys

And not in the usual way, either! Our hats are all the way off to the third person, who hated seeing two beautiful people fight like that, and wanted to set the record straight. You’re beautiful too!

Things I hate

The further you get down this list the better it gets. Vandalism is a terrible thing that has ruined many of our public places, but at least this particular piece of vandalism is self-aware and full of good humor.

Things I hate
Things I hate

While vandalism is rightly discouraged, stuff like this is much better to see than just the random names, phone numbers, twitter handles, and messages of hate that are plastered all over restrooms across the country.

A swing and a miss

Proper spelling and grammar are important. They’re like your business card, presenting yourself to the world. It’s the first thing about you people will notice when they read something you wrote.

A swing and a miss
A swing and a miss

Even if that something is just “your stupid” on a bathroom stall somewhere. Luckily, one intrepid grammar vigilante was on the case, and was quick to point out the person’s mistake to them. Let that be a lesson to you, folks – if you’re going to pointlessly insult people in bathrooms, spell check!

Profound

This toilet user for some reason wanted people to know exactly what their cat’s breath smells like and the reason why. Yes, cat breath does smell like cat food!

Profound
Profound

What this message lacks in groundbreaking knowledge, it more than makes up for with blunt simplicity, and this fun little picture of a cat. If you didn’t believe this cat has cat food breath, then the little fish odors should convince you once and for all.

Someone’s got to be first

A few years ago hipsters were pretty much around every corner, lurking in coffee shops thinking of new ways to turn old stuff into cool stuff once again.

Someone’s got to be first
Someone’s got to be first


This joke makes fun of those people as it recognizes they might have done a lot of the things they did just to appear cool. Sure, hipsters are always trying to find new cool things to do, but only if the others are doing it too… they don’t want to be the only one!

The truth

The truth hurts sometimes, but often it is the best way to get the message across. This message is boldly out there for all of those people who love wearing their Crocs in public, nobody loves them! Sure they are probably really comfortable and practical, but they don’t look great, and sometimes it isn’t enough that they are comfortable.

The truth
The truth

Despite what the person who wrote this message thinks, we are pretty sure the Croc lovers in the world don’t care, and they’ll continue wearing them.

Nans are the best

We can’t argue with this message, nans really are great. Especially if you are hungry as they will make sure you are well fed and they won’t stop feeding you until you are ready to burst.

Nans are the best
Nans are the best

While people might be looking for a different kind of good time from the messages written on the wall in a public restroom, this sound advice will be much more rewarding, and it’ll probably make your nan happy too, what could be better?

Compliance

People who question everything have to care a lot about some stuff that really doesn’t matter in the grand scheme of things. Whoever seen this note wasn’t ready to let this comment slide without a question of their own. Why should we question everything?

Compliance
Compliance

Just because somebody told us to on a bathroom stall? It seems much less rebellious if you are just doing what you are told, so we are glad someone had the courage to ask the important question about this comment, for the good of us all.

You’re on your own

We wouldn’t dare to judge somebody for what they like to do in their spare time, especially if it isn’t hurting anyone else, but following the advice of the previous message, we have some questions about the whole thing. Why? Why would you want to pretend you are a meatball?

You’re on your own
You’re on your own

Also, that meatball really needs some spaghetti to go with it. Another thing, where do you get enough tomato sauce to fill a bathtub? Just asking for a friend.

Hail fabric!

Sometimes there is nothing funnier than a well-placed typo. This person was trying to be edgy with their hailing of a certain biblical demon, but their typo just makes it look as though they really love their fabric.

Hail fabric!
Hail fabric!


As the person below commented, sure satin is a nice fabric, but does it really rule? If you were to ask us, we would have to say that cotton most certainly rules, we probably don’t need to draw a pentagram to show our support for it though.

Figure out this

Sometimes when you write something out, it makes sense in your own mind, but when you take a step back it appears to be complete gobbledygook. What was meant to be an inspirational quote from Wayne Gretzky turned into a message of confusion.

Figure out this
Figure out this

It looks like the person writing this just ran out of space on the tile they started on so instead of going underneath went beside and made us all have to take a second look at this to work it out.

Free bacon

Bacon is one of those meats that so many people love. Vegetarians have even been known to give up their diets as they were unable to resist the lure of bacon as the smell wafted through the air when being cooked.

Free bacon
Free bacon

This restroom comedian has managed to turn this regular hand dryer into a thing of beauty. Now when you wash your hands, instead of drying them, you’ll be rewarded with a fresh piece of bacon.

Would you try?

The magical world of Harry Potter has inspired millions of people to read and immerse themselves in the beautiful world author J. K. Rowling created. In that world, we learn that the wizards and witches who work in the Ministry of Magic enter their workplace through the restroom toilets by flushing themselves.

Would you try?
Would you try?

They go from the Muggle world to the wizarding world in the most disgusting way possible. If you saw this message would you try to flush yourself?

Literary genius

Have you ever tried to write a haiku, the Japanese form of poetry? It requires people to write just three verse in seventeen syllables, and according to this note they are easy, but we aren’t sure they are as simple as is being made out…

Literary genius
Literary genius

We wonder how long somebody had to sit there trying to come up with this particular poem, but it was a stroke of genius to pluck a refrigerator out of thin air.

Yeah, she is!

Ususally if there is a message about somebody’s mom written in a public bathroom, then the chances are that it isn’t going to be very nice what they say about her.

Yeah, she is!
Yeah, she is!

‘Your mom’ jokes have been trying to provoke people for years, but this joke flips that on its head. Instead of insulting, it is simply a message recognizing how great your mom is. They must have met our mom because she really is a nice lady!

Degree

Some people now argue that a degree isn’t worth the paper it is written on anymore. You can get a degree in pretty much any subject you can think of, including; Politicizing Beyonce, Zombie Studies, and Arguing with Judge Judy. With so many new kinds of degrees veering away from traditional subjects, this person has compared a degree to toilet paper.

Degree
Degree

Perhaps this message is a social commentary on the effect of oversubscription to colleges, lowering the value of a degree as every person and their dog can get one now.

Art in its purest form?

This message argues that true art is neither done for the money or the fame but purely for the people who will see it and the own artist’s ideas.

Art in its purest form?
Art in its purest form?

It is an interesting concept and perhaps bathroom art is the last one true artform left in the world. Maybe using this inspiration, art galleries will soon start exhibiting the walls of our bathroom stalls in their open spaces for critics to discuss which is the most powerful message.

Trying to start a riot

For a lot of fans of sci-fi movie franchise Star Wars, Boba Fett is one of their favorite characters. The bounty hunter comes across as one of the coolest characters who could put up a good fight against the evil Darth Vader if he needed to.

Trying to start a riot
Trying to start a riot

Putting this message on the wall of the bathroom stall is likely to start a riot if the right person reads this. Clearly, this message was meant to be controversial, and it’s only a matter of time until the angry replies start coming in.

Ripped from the headlines

There’s a lot to be said for getting involved politically on the grassroots level. Calling your representative, demonstrating, signing petitions – it’s all part and parcel of a healthy democratic body politic.

Ripped from the headlines
Ripped from the headlines

Without people getting involved, there really is no democracy. Now, having said all that, if you are going to get involved, you should probably remember two things. Firstly, scribbles inside bathroom stalls probably isn’t the best way of getting your message across. Secondly, you should probably focus on causes a little less nuts than arms deals with penguins.

So which one are you?

Look, leaving graffiti on bathroom walls is immature. It’s also a form of vandalism. We can see why you’d want to come out against it, especially if you’re in charge of cleaning that particular bathroom.

So which one are you?
So which one are you?

We’re behind you 100 percent. We only have one minor quibble, we’re almost too embarrassed to even bring it up but here goes… If your working assumption is that “only children and truck drivers” write on bathroom walls, maybe the best way to get your message across isn’t… to write it on a bathroom wall.

Not a Queen fan, we guess

If you’ve seen Bohemian Rhapsody, the hit movie about the life and career of Freddy Mercury and his iconic band, you recognize this quote. Heck, it’s taken from the song that gave the movie its title!

Not a Queen fan, we guess
Not a Queen fan, we guess

That’d be cool enough taken alone, but then someone came and upped the ante with classic SpongeBob SquarePants hilarity. Patrick, SpongeBob’s dimwitted best friend, works the phone at the Krusty Krab. When people call in and ask, “Is this the Krusty Krab?” all he can shout back is, “No, this is Patrick!” Good times.

Ah, cruel irony

Just picture the scene – every time you walk into a public restroom, you see all of the funny or disgusting notes people have scribbled on the walls and stalls. “One day,” you say to yourself, “one day that’ll be me.

Ah, cruel irony
Ah, cruel irony

One day it’ll be my time to shine.” But alas, every time you’re without a tool to immortalize your innermost thoughts, fears, and hopes. Because who just walks around with a sharpie? Then one day, by pure chance, you have one on you. And then… Nothing. Bummer.

Waiting for Mr. Right

There are 62,380 people in the U.S. whose first name is “Matt.” That’s right, we crunched the numbers on this one.

Waiting for Mr. Right
Waiting for Mr. Right

Now, if we say there are 329,033,860 people living in the United States (give or take a few people), then 328,971,480 people will just see that scribbled message, shake their heads, and move on once they finish doing their business. But if your name is actually Matt, like the guy who snapped this pic, then boy are you ever in for a scare.

Just what we needed

Let’s be honest, we’ve all been there. You’re in class, take a midterm or some other important test, and you start getting the sweats. You crammed and crammed, but somehow you’re still unprepared.

Just what we needed
Just what we needed

How is that even possible? “Mrs. Wilson,” you ask, “may I be excused to go to the bathroom?” She says yes and you leave class, wondering what the point of going on even is. And then you enter the stall, look to the side and there it is. That, my friend, is called nirvana.

Poetry in motion

Kathy Mattea’s 1989 country music classic Come from the Heart contains the lyrics, “You’ve got to sing like you don’t need the money, love like you’ll never get hurt. You’ve got to dance like nobody’s watching.”

Poetry in motion
Poetry in motion


From there, that last line took on a life of its own, and has been attributed to everyone from authors Mark Twain and William Purkey to Major League Baseball pitcher Satchel Paige (for some reason). So here’s the little known last line of the song, decorated with pretty flowers for added effect.

Citation needed

Charles Darwin is one of the most famous scientists in history. His voyage on the HMS Beagle became legendary as the observations he made during that journey led to his theories on evolution and natural selection.

Citation needed
Citation needed

He’s not really known for famous quotations though. Unless you read one of his numerous books, that is, and who has the time to do that? It’s a good thing public bathrooms are here, then, so we can catch up on our scientific quotes. Only… Hm. We’re not so sure about this one. Judges?

From me, to you

We’re kinda getting mixed signals here. It’s thought provoking and poignant on the one hand, but… it’s scrawled on a bathroom wall, and actually gives bathroom graffiti as an example of looking for meaning in all the wrong places.

From me, to you
From me, to you


Is it funny? Is it supposed to be transformative? Who knows! All we know is that last line about “I wonder who you are” just makes us afraid someone is going to pop their head over the door and ask us what we thought of their insight into the human condition.

One of us

We’re definitely NOT getting mixed signals from this genius, we’ll tell you that much. For the record, the fact our respective derrières have touched the same surface in no way makes us brothers, or “one.”

One of us
One of us

It’s already all we can do to not completely cover ourselves in saran wrap whenever we set food inside one of those germ infested places. The absolute last thing we want to think about in that moment is all of the other people who have used it before us, or our everlasting connection to them.

Unexpected wisdom

This person, clearly recently let go from his job at the fortune cookie note writing factory, left this heartwarming message on the wall of some random bathroom. “May your life be like a roll of toilet paper,” he writes, “long and useful.”

Unexpected wisdom
Unexpected wisdom

That’s a nice enough sentiment, we suppose. Although we’re not sure toilet paper would be the first analogy we might’ve come up with. But still, it’s better than wishing someone their life was like toilet paper, cheap and smeared with poop, right?

(Don’t) Use the force

This is another one from the files of “insightful and wise life advice” that doubles as “pragmatic bathroom advice.” When they say not to force it, they might mean your relationships with other people.

(Don’t) Use the force
(Don’t) Use the force

You shouldn’t force people to be close to you. Attachments should be created naturally, between two people who genuinely want to be close to each other in this crazy, mixed up world. Or they might just mean not to strain on the toilet. That stuff will give you haemorrhoids! Yeah, it’s probably that second thing.

‘The Chamber Of Secrets had been opened’

If you’ve gotten this far, you’ve already seen the toilet that supposedly leads to the Ministry of Magic. Well, this particular scrawl makes no such lofty claims.

‘The Chamber Of Secrets had been opened’
‘The Chamber Of Secrets had been opened’

Instead, it only helpfully directs you to the Chamber of Secrets, which is conveniently located in the next stall. Now, if we remember our Harry Potter lore correctly, the Chamber was actually accessible through a bathroom, the very same one occupied by pesky teenage ghost Moaning Myrtle. It all checks out. Do you have the guts to check?

Thanks for the history lesson

This bathroom Lothario knew just the line to use to have the ladies lining up around the block to meet him. “On a scale of 1 to America, how free are you tonight?” he wrote, chuckling to himself that he’d soon need to invest in a stick to keep the ladies off him when he gets too many of them.

Thanks for the history lesson
Thanks for the history lesson

Then, with two simple words – well, a word and a number – he was destroyed. “Germany, 1942.” He’s not coming back from that one.

Always look at the fine print

They say that “The best-laid plans of mice and men often go awry,” and that’s so true. Just take this bathroom scribble as a case in point.

Always look at the fine print
Always look at the fine print

One well-meaning person came along, and just wanted to leave a really heartfelt message to all of the people who’ll use the bathroom after him. “Love one another.” As simple as it is powerful. And then some sneaky jokester happened by, saw this message, and figured he could improve it just a little bit.

Yeah, she is – part deux

These sort of pictures of bathrooms and the funny message scrawled on them have a tendency to go viral. They get passed around, tons of people see them, and copycats soon emerge.

Yeah, she is – part deux
Yeah, she is – part deux

It’s like turning lead into gold. Everybody tries, but few people succeed. This person must have seen the “Your mom is a nice lady” pic, and wanted to duplicate it. But then he realized how unoriginal it is to write exactly the same. “Oh, no!” he started to panic. But then it came to him, clear as day…

Backhanded compliment

This starts off innocently enough as one of those rare well-wishing bathroom scribbles. “You will live an amazing life,” the anonymous writer wishes everyone who reads their message. Aww, that’s nice.

Backhanded compliment
Backhanded compliment

Really warms the heart to receive such a message in such an unexpected place. But then your eyes go down to the line below, obviously written by the same person, and it says, “With your cats.” You know, like you’re one of those crazy, lonely cat ladies. Gee, thanks.

Children are our future

We like to think this one’s on the wall of a high school bathroom somewhere in America. A wise aleck starts us off by saying how afraid he is of bathroom graffiti. Not terribly witty, but we’ll allow it.

Children are our future
Children are our future

Then, following the stream (no pun intended) of consciousness writing we have going here, another brilliant mind came along and wrote this Marianne Williamson quote, made famous in the 2005 film Coach Carter. Finally, the class valedictorian wobbled in, and wrote he could “count to potato.” Hope for the future, folks!

Making it work

There are two kinds of people in this world. There are those who leave the seat up when they’re done with the toilet, and there are those who put it down.

Making it work
Making it work

However, wires can be crossed sometimes, and people soon get up in arms about whether the seat should be kept up or down. These two notes seem to counteract each other, but it feels as though an agreement has been made? If guys put the seat down and girls leave the seat up, everyone is happy, right?

A gentle reminder

Most human beings have been using bathrooms and toilets for much of their life, but it seems as though some people still need a gentle reminder as to how to use them.

A gentle reminder
A gentle reminder

We don’t know why – or really want to know why – this sign had to be made and stuck up, but we can only imagine this garbage can got a little messy. We can understand why someone would want to make a note to remind people, because cleaning that up for a second time would not be fun.

Stop being lazy

Have you ever lived with other people and been involved in a toilet paper war? When the person who uses the last roll doesn’t replace it, those who make their way into the bathroom after them also refuse to change the roll out of principle.

Stop being lazy
Stop being lazy

After all, whoever uses the last roll always has to change. Unfortunately, it seems as though this person lives with someone who is pretty lazy, and even two different notes won’t get them into action.

That’s gross

Some people just love to make their mark, and it seems as though one person decided to go above and beyond to truly make their mark on this bathroom stall.

That’s gross
That’s gross

We can only assume that this person didn’t have a pen to hand, which is why they decided to cover their lips with their favorite lipstick and kiss the wall instead. While it was a great idea in theory, the second note has it covered. Kissing a bathroom wall is pretty gross because you never know what kind of germs are thriving on that thing.

I’ll be here

There’s something so enticing about seeing a freshly painted wall, and it seems as though some people just feel the urge to write over it. Of course, those in charge of keeping bathrooms clean aren’t too fond of these kind people, so they spend most of their days painting over these notes in the hope that it will deter these vandals.

I’ll be here
I’ll be here

However, the person who wrote the note in the first place was a regular in this bathroom stall, and they weren’t going to let their note be painted over as if it was never there…

Making a doozer

Let’s be honest; nobody really likes to acknowledge the fact that people use the toilets for the reasons that they do, but it’s just a natural way of life. Everyone has to go to the bathroom, and everyone has to use them in the same way.

Making a doozer
Making a doozer

Because of this, it seems as though more and more people are able to make jokes and doozers about these particular events. These IT whizzes decided to do just that when they put up this sign in the bathroom, and we bet it curbed the awkwardness.

Feeling passive-aggressive

It’s fair to say that people have some really strong feelings about the bathrooms of the world, and toilets are especially a sore point.

Feeling passive-aggressive
Feeling passive-aggressive

It seems as though everyone thinks that they know the best way to deal with these toilets, but nobody can really agree on what they want. When one person couldn’t deal with the fact that someone had left the seat up, someone who doesn’t care about the seat being up decided to retort in a passive-aggressive manner.

Waiting a long time

Bathrooms are often filled with official signs that give people an indication of things that they need to do – such as wash their hands after doing their business.

Waiting a long time
Waiting a long time

However, these signs can sometimes be a little deceiving, and there’s no doubt about the fact that this is one of them. After all, is this sign asking employees to wash their own hands? Or is it saying that employees will come along and wash someone else’s hands? Apparently, it’s not the latter option, as this person found out…

She’s vegan

Yo’mama jokes are some of the most iconic jokes of all time, and it seems as though you just can’t go wrong with them – or can you? When this person tried to be funny with their yo’ mama joke, they forgot to account for the vegans of the world.

She’s vegan
She’s vegan

After all, while there are some mamas in this world who do eat scotch eggs, there are others who aren’t too fond of them. Unless, of course, they are vegan scotch eggs. These are changing times, people, so it’s time to change your bathroom notes.

I’m starving

Sometimes there’s just no easy way to tell someone that they need to change the toilet paper. While you can ask them time and time again, these people often just ignore you and carry on doing their own thing.

I’m starving
I’m starving

Yet, that doesn’t mean that people don’t try. This person decided to stop asking the culprit to change the toilet paper for them, but to change the toilet paper for the holder. After all, the toilet paper holder was starving and seriously needed some nutrients.

Listening and talking

Many people like to put philosophical quotes in bathroom stalls, and someone wanted to remind others that life is too short to be unhappy – but it seems as though that didn’t go down too well with everyone else.

Listening and talking
Listening and talking

One person didn’t want to take orders from a wall, and another just happened to remind them that they were actually talking to a wall, as well. This bathroom exchange was certainly something special and has probably provided entertainment for many bathroom users since it was first written.

Snooping around

Have you ever made your way to someone else’s house, gone to the bathroom, and had a real urge to look in the medicine cabinet? Well, it seems as though you’re not alone.

Snooping around
Snooping around

When this woman went on a date, she couldn’t fight the urge to look in the medicine cabinet and see what her date was hiding. Of course, if her date was going to forgive her for snooping, then she had to forgive him for doing something else. We’re not quite sure that’s how it works. Let’s hope this is a joke.

Getting philosophical

At first, we thought this was a really deep observation. Clearly, someone was in communion with the universe as they sat there doing their business, and they had a moment of enlightenment they simply had to share.

Getting philosophical
Getting philosophical

Thinking about it some more, though, we reached the conclusion that we don’t think they’re right. After all, is beauty not in the eye of the beholder? How would you know if we can or can’t find beauty even in public bathrooms? Don’t judge us. We happen to admire tastefully arranged stacks of toilet paper.

Great tip, thanks!

Look, let’s just come out and say this – sometimes going number-two in a public bathroom is super awkward and embarrassing. Yes, it’s a natural part of human life, but does it have to make all those sounds?!

Great tip, thanks!
Great tip, thanks!


There’s a reason we hold everything in the entire nine-hour workday, but if you’re not like us and have to go anyway, here’s a handy tip. Do keep in mind, though, that if you take them up on their advice you might be responsible for someone in the next stall over getting a heart attack.

That’s gotta hurt

Have you ever seen Beauty and the Beast? Sure you have, it’s a classic. Either the animated original or the live-action remake, they’re both awesome. But have you ever given a thought to the objects around the Beast’s castle?

That’s gotta hurt
That’s gotta hurt

They all used to be people, but were transformed into household items when their prince was cursed. We meet a candelabra, a clock, and even a teapot and teacup, but there are other rooms we never get to see. Places like… the bathroom. We’ll let your imagination take it from there.

Controversial

The people who write on the walls in the stall are not always looking to make people laugh, sometimes they like to write controversial things to see if they can spark a discussion.

Controversial
Controversial

While there is no discussion about his comment yet, there would have been plenty of people who read this message and had to question the logic behind it. Sure Toy Story 2 was not quite as great as the first one, but it was still a great movie, that many of us grew up loving.

Judgement Day

If you’ve ever seen the action movie Terminator 2: Judgement Day then this image will speak to you. This is the liquid metal terminator, obsessed with tracking down John Connor and taking him out before he has the chance to grow up and become a resistance fighter against the terminators in the future.

Judgement Day
Judgement Day

It’s a complicated timeline, but this toilet flusher perfectly resembles the metal spike the terminator can make from his arm.

ToiletAdvisor

These guys are joking, but it got us thinking about developing a new app or service that ranks public bathrooms. We’ll be millionaires! While we’re working on developing it, though, let’s all appreciate these jokers’ handiwork. Well, we say “jokers” because we assume at least two people were involved.

ToiletAdvisor
ToiletAdvisor

The “response from management” seems to have been written in different handwriting, and the text’s color isn’t the same either. If this was all written by the same person, who intentionally brought two different markers for the purpose AND changed their writing, we’ll cut them a check when our company goes public.